“Oh come on Audrey! You’re in Paris! What could possibly be wrong?” Sarah says. Her long exasperated exhales turn into fog in the cold air.
Oh boy. I have to think quickly. I can’t have my cousin kill me under the Eiffel. Clearly, I’ve messed up. There’s only one thing that can get me out of this predicament.
“I’m hungry,” I say. “Aren’t you hungry?”
Sarah has no words. Good. I’ll fill in the blanks – quickly.
“I think we’re both hungry,” I say. “Let’s find a place to eat. My treat.” I start walking. I don’t know where I’m going but I’ve found that Paris is a perfect place to get lost. Sarah throws her hands up in the air and follows me.
We find a warm and welcoming Indian restaurant on the corner of a quaint cobblestone street. Inside, the lights glow an amber yellow and over steaming hot bowls of chicken curry and basmati rice I do some explaining – kind of. I tell Sarah that things aren’t going so well with my engagement.
“You and Jason have been together for a long time,” she says. “Either you two will work it out or maybe he just isn’t the one.”
I agree – knowing Jason and I are pretty much over. Over the past four years, the arguing grew more frequent and Jason was lying about what he was doing and whom he was doing things with. What I don’t tell Sarah is that my heart wasn’t breaking just because my engagement was unraveling. It was breaking because I was disappointed – in myself.
I know what Sarah sees when she looks at me. I am 21-years-old, recently graduated with a degree in Journalism, and working an exciting job as a reporter for our local paper in Virginia. I have, for now, a very cute fiancé. As far as she’s concerned, I am on my way to marital bliss and stability. What more could I possibly want?
Sarah is slightly younger than me, petite (like me), dark curly hair, very cute and very smart. She graduated valedictorian from her high school and is now studying in Kensington – something to do with science and medicine. At this point in her life, she can do whatever she wants to do. At this very moment, over the last spoonful of her curry, she can decide to stay in Europe and live in Paris – done and done, just like that. No fear.
That’s what I wanted.